Lord's will....

It happened that my former supervisor is back from her maternity leave, all shining in complexion, and back in shape too...haha...I sense some stress within her too, attempting to accept the challenge of motherhood...I wish to tell her that she has NO IDEA what pain and grief is awaiting her when her baby springs from toddler to young adult....since i know that im being a PITA to my mom...poor mom...

She was rather surprised im still around, and seemed delighted seeing me..(pls bear with my 'perasan'..)..she asked me if my current supervisor is treating me well and if i can cope with everything that im taught of, i answered primly that ive got everything under control and that she shouldnt worry too much....well, maybe she should, since im still having trouble understanding some of the scripts and binaries that were installed into the server, but that's another issue altogether...

So it is officially Christmas month, and ive yet to embark on a shopping spree expedition, i guess it's an achievement on my part, spending less money as part of my last year's resolutions...I figured saving up some money for future travelling would be more worthwhile than buying unnecessary stuff...Some form of maturity is taking place without me knowing it...Another achievement...:)

I have been talking to this sister from church, confessing to her that i no longer hear what Lord has to say to me...im jz losing grip, if u ask me...She has advised me to quiet down my heart, my life, my activities...put all worries and dilemmas away, and focus on God...that's the art of listening apparently, and im still trying...

Lately i have been urging Lord to take control of my life coz i felt that im on the verge of slipping backward, the inclination is increasing and im losing my foothold...it seemed ive been condescending to do things that i felt Lord wont b pleased of, but i did it anyway...The truth is, He's always been there and i somewhat took Him for granted, knowing that He will be there fixing and cleaning up my mess...

I know that i shd leave my destiny in His hand, and shdnt jz follow my heart's desire....What He wants in for my best interest, i have nv doubted it, ever...